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Impulse control – lets all take charge!
Wednesday, 23 April 2008.
Originally from express article 23 April 2008
By Di from Auckland Community Alcohol and Drug Services (CADS)
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| Di from CADS on impulse control. |
Oh yes… we have all been there, faced with that split second choice, an action that will give us instant pleasure – but could have hugely negative consequences. For many of us in gay communities the stakes can very high – risking HIV infection, drug overdose and physical abuse.
Our impulses can be hugely powerful coming from our basic drive for things that give us pleasure. So – what makes the difference between us acting on these impulses that could ultimately be destructive or keeping ourselves safe?
For some the loss of control is so great that it can be seen as a psychological impulse control disorder. For examples Intermittent Explosive Disorder – this is when someone often loses control of their temper, becoming aggressive and violent but they blame the situation or other people rather than taking responsibility themselves. Domestic Violence is an example of this though these people often exhibit more control outside their domestic situation – which is why people respond with "No! Really? I would never have thought of him/her being like that!". Then there's the Impulse Control Disorders like Kleptomania – compulsive stealing and Pyromania – setting fires for pleasure. The message is these disorders do not need to be life sentences for people experiencing them or for those round them. With the right professional help and support, people can learn how to take control of their impulses. In fact we all can especially if others are there to support us.
This is where we as a community have to start to take some responsibility. Young people especially are vulnerable and there are people who don’t give a damn if they live or die – but all of us have to stay vigilant. It is not ok that levels of HIV infection are on the rise. It is not ok that young people are taken advantage of by older people in our community. Add alcohol and other drugs to these situations and it makes for a dangerous mix.
Instead of just being the person who buys the drinks how about being the sober driver, supplying fabulous non-alcoholic alternatives at our parties, talking about what to do if faced with a situation where there are no condoms... Or bringing a loved one you are concerned about to CADS – these are ways we can show each other we care.
I am looking forward to the day when we consistently have the ‘hard conversations’ and make the hard decisions (e.g. "sorry darling, you know I love you, and you really have had enough, so I am going to take you home now"). How come some of us feel we can say things like this to our biological family, but not to people in our own 'created' family? – together we could really take charge.
If you have concerns about your own or someone else's alcohol or other drug use, or if you'd like more information, contact CADS on 845 1818 or www.cads.org.nz. If you live outside Auckland contact Alcohol and Drug Helpline 0800 787 797.
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> More items from Di's Drug Column
